Jam

Sometimes it gets too crowded in the tiny space allocated to me on this planet; both physically and virtually, which makes it harder and harder to focus with the proximity of the surrounding distractions and confusing events.

That’s the time when brakes should be stepped to hold in place for some time, and decide either to pause, or pull away and enjoy some peace of mind analyzing the circus running in my brain and causing a noisy jam in its circuitry.

Who are these people surrounding me? What are these groups doing in my zone? Wow, it seems like an attempt to fit me in some sort of an affinity diagram in order to group me with some other individuals in relevant groupings that produce distinct and well-defined groups.

Oops I just remembered! Yes!!! Yes, yes, yes 😀 I was born free, and in respect of my freedom I will try my best to scrutinize what is being delivered to me and not get carried away with any current easily.

So what are the groupings on the affinity diagram?

Grouping 1: they adopt a specific belief (social, political, religious, etc) because they don’t know how to stand out from the crowd, and they need to belong to something to feel worthiness and achieve self-actualization.

Grouping 2: they adopt an opposing group to grouping 1 to prove they stand out from them. This results in them not adopting a definite orientation since they are merely mocking and criticizing grouping 1.

Grouping 3: they resist adopting a specific orientation and prefer to remain out of order even when they know for fact the right orientation. Sometimes it is largely attributed to the associated costs of improving themselves, or adjusting their environment to meet the standards of this orientation even if it was the right path.

Grouping 4: adopts no grouping because they are intellectually independent, self-oriented and don’t like to be directed by the goals and interests of a specific group. They search for the true knowledge by themselves and try their best to obtain it from trusted sources while being fully aware that as long as an orientation or a group has a name and an official existence/entity, most likely no freedom of thought is entailed.

Grouping 5: they just twist with any orientation that serves their interest, and search continually for groups that reflect a stronger image of their weak characters and help them fake what they need for achieving their goals, regardless the consequences.

So, what’s your conclusion Re’aam?

The rule is quite simple: if we have to justify something to somebody then a probability that we are not fully convinced about it exists. Question it before anybody else does 🙂

Twisted

On the other end of the phone she was crying and sobbing over a need she worked hard to satisfy but failed badly to; only to end shredded in total despair, vulnerability, and devastation.

During direct communication with her she conveys and fully adopts the model of a simple female with low to moderate needs; being the trivially demanding lady. She portrays herself as well as a victim of people in her life and events she experience.

Social networks is a great arena for her to express herself the way she prefers to be perceived and drawn in others’ minds. From that point she excelled in tailoring her marketing techniques to the service of her growing desires. She also managed to secure a friendly perception of herself; an image necessary to hide a competitive spirit willing to ruin anybody who stand or might in her desires’ way.

Too many conflicting incidents accumulated at this point; giving rise to a persistent need to:

Pause ||

Tick, tock, tick, tock…

Time was passing by very slowly at the earliest shocks and disturbing discoveries, at an accelerated pace later on, driven into uncontrolled velocity eventually.

Having experienced so much, rewinding became a must , not for the sake of experiencing the exact details, but rather for the purpose of learning the maximal lessons that could be grasped.

Resume ||

Through time progression the very friend grew into a frenemy only to mature into a true enemy, which happened to be so since their earliest relationship with everybody. While she pictured herself being a victim of everybody, everybody ended being a victim of her unique twisted attributes, conspiracy being the least of them.

With schizophrenic tendency, and aggressively developing severe sick psychological conditions, she found no better strategy than to impersonate others in different occasions in a way that suits her needs, while utilizing whatever details she could collect about those she needs to impersonate during a journey dedicated to fulfill an abnormal, and uncontrollable curiosity.

Those low breakdown moments were her most sincere and act-fake free times when anybody could get to know her for real. Throughout those times she exposed her deep twisted character hidden underneath thick layers of conspiracy, deception and dishonesty, totally naked for anyone to not observe or mistaken the ugly and evil character she grew into.

Her barely average capabilities made her unable to remain balanced under pressure and stress, at which point she responds by becoming an overly-chaotic being, unleashing dark secrets and disgusting areas hidden skillfully underneath the skins she keeps borrowing and wearing.

In total disgrace, anybody who knows her pretty well, regret knowing her at all, and question their intelligence and how it betrayed them failing to uncover the true self of her earlier in the course of meeting her.

Speak Out Your Mind

Speak out your mind; what the world thinks is important, but what you think is more important. Remember you live with your own mind 24/7, so you are the one who will ultimately bear with fears, doubts, concerns, confusing issues, problematic situations, challenges, etc, residing in your mind.

Speak out your mind because definitely no one else will speak that mind of yours, and even if they do they won’t be accurate, precise, and as good as you will be.

Speak out your mind and be sure that if your close society is not interested to hear it, other parts of the world might be badly curious to hear it and explore it further.

Speak out your mind and be confident that once you do: fears can be faced; mistakes can be spotted and corrected, confusions might be clarified, dark spots might turn into paths of light and glory, and unexplored beauty might be explored and hopefully found by experts seeking uniqueness.

Speak out your mind, and not anybody else’s mind. No need to fake knowing/not-knowing something or fake being somebody else, you are what you are because of the values and beliefs you hold, and that is what you should reflect.

Speak out your mind and be sure that one day the sun will shine on forgotten or unexplored areas of your beautiful mind to unleash talents you may have never known about or at least forgotten.

Just do it and speak out your mind simply.

Communication Tactics

Everybody has their own communication style. I prefer communication to be in its simplest, direct and straightforward form. This communication style ensures verifying facts, testing hypotheses easily, and challenging assumptions regarding certain people/situations at a relatively low cost.

People have variant types and levels of intelligence which they usually employ to read between the lines, and dig beyond the surface to uncover hidden/implicit messages in communication. Categories include people who have the ability to deceive, which is an ability that cannot be utilized indefinitely. Another category would try to manipulate us for the purpose of distracting us from pursuing our main goals. A third category might claim they have no clue about the discussion topic to avoid any conflict or even confrontation. In all cases, make sure to place finding the truth as your sole destination. To the extent necessary, you might decide to become flexible and vary in the communication methods, tools, or even style until you achieve satisfactory results.

Remember always to remain patient and not to be fooled by superficial & quick reactions. You can also employ the following tactics, which might seem repetitive (there is nothing new about them). However; employing these tactics intelligently and in the right context with customization to the specific needs of the situation could make them of great service.

Below are the Communication Tactics:

(1)   We might need to communicate with people who disappointed us after they turned their back on us to face the fact that they proved to be a source of frustration, they failed us when they should’ve been there for us, and to remain determinant when we decide not to give them second chances.

(2)   We might need to communicate more with people whom we have doubts about or can’t trust. Keep communicating with them until you break them, and make it evident to others that the trust you have for them has come to ashes. This is specifically necessary if you have concerns about them conveying false and distorted facts about you to a third-party who both of you know, and whom you care about your relationship with. It is worth mentioning that the greater the effort they place to break the trust between you and this third-party, the greater the trust this third-party has in you.

(3)   In some cases, we have no other option but to disclose a relatively significant amount of information to people we don’t trust as a result of them intervening with the course of our lives and our inability to block them. If you are to use this tactic, remember to share only well-known and established facts about yourself, which you have high confidence you will not be vulnerable if they were exposed, and which are too clear and straight forward to be distorted.

(4)   People will always alter the communicated message, so don’t pay much mind to that. Just focus on being consistent in your communication as this will definitely reveal the inconsistency in the other party’s story.

(5)   Most importantly, we all failed several times in our lives, when we trusted many wrong people and couldn’t learn except from our own experiences. Trial and error usually help to decide which is the best communication channel to use with the person.

Personal Observations about Humans Series (5)

• Always be open while listening to others’ opinions/ speeches. Ending conversations with people you already know very well because you are confident you know how the conversation will end, or because you assume the speaker will draw the same conclusion drawn before is biased and assumes the speaker thinks always in repetitive patterns. This might be the least wise option as the end of the conversation and the message intended to be delivered might be totally unexpected. Please refrain from presumptions and previous knowledge and try to make wise judgments based on evaluation of new situations while weighing the need to whether refer to past experiences or isolate thoughts from the past.
• Disappointments could be of recurring pattern in a specific person’s life. It’s not bad luck; they expect and fail to meet their expectations before exploring the person/situation to verify if they meet these expectations with full confidence. Invest sufficient effort and time to understand whether the person/situation will be up to your level of expectations in the first place.
• If a friend betrayed their friend secretly and consistently, then we can say with quite confidence they were pretending to be friends and staying close to the person for some motive; e.g. competition, jealousy, envy, etc. They may have been merely following the rule “keep your friends close and keep your enemies closer”. Worse than that is faking they are sincere friends, investigating personal issues without any permission and interfering by offering help without being asked to, which altogether make early signs that these persons might be the major source of harm and cause of misery despite pretending they are the only salvation.
• It hurts but sometimes the person has to live with its price and painful consequences, as in the case of a lady where a man forces himself in her life, fails to fulfill any of his promises, presents a disappointment example in all aspects and turns his back only to leave cleaning the mess he caused to her own creativity. The main characteristic to manhood we should instil in our sons should be: standing up to any word a man says, and dealing with its consequences rationally.
• Some people make money of other people’s naivety and inability to be unique or have an independent character and mind set. When they try to deal with the pressure, they end up complying with peer pressure or trendy aspects of living, whether to survive/advance in the society they stand in or to become part of a higher-rank society. Brand names and spending fortunes on some of them is a good example. Behind some of these brand names is average CEOs sitting idly waiting for average people to consume their products/services and maximize their profits with least effort to brag about the outstanding results throughout economic news bulletins, magazines, newsletters, newspapers or other media. They benefit from societal jealousy, competition, envy, or desires mimicked from others when the person fears being rejected/neglected by a society where the person is judged by tags, and where capitalism rules only to feed economic greed, satisfy political goals, cold wars and armed struggles. The capitalistic model does an amazing job in making the rich richer, the poor poorer and financing wars which we, our nations, creeds, or our beloved ones might be its target. The economic-political system is amazingly interconnected, intelligently sucks our own efforts and relies on turning individuals into armies (with or without armor) to serve the desires of a specific person or move.

Personal Observations about Humans Series (3)

Whilst watching the generation produced as a result of extensive employment of thoughts from diverse disciplines (targeted advertising and marketing, behavioral and psychological aspects of human activities and technology, oriented media, social networks psychology, human programming, maximizing social and economic benefits); I notice the following:

• In any communication process; if the communication medium is a human, or can be adjusted or controlled by a human; the communicated message might be modified aggressively (or even transformed completely) to serve the interest/end of this human.
• Everything relies on the core, and especially the supplementary. We should always try to maintain the core at minimum, because the supplementary will have nothing to rely on. Both the supplementary and the core will be lost, and only fake images will prevail to cover on inferiorities.
• If you are an above average human (in terms of social intelligence), you shouldn’t take politics as a career. Politics in itself is not a standalone end but rather a mean that satisfies other ends. Politics was originally designed to serve economic and social interests. It fascinates average humans who like to be the center of attention or gossip.
• The human mind will always be limited to simpler and straight forward calculations while in reality it will encounter superior, complex, unforeseeable and extraordinary scenarios, where completely unpredictable results ensue.
• We cannot push somebody to grow beyond the limitations of their environments or the boundaries of their society if they were average-mentality persons; for example:
• A girl cannot develop into a quality, balanced and wise lady, while she lives in a society with shallow intellect, where she is evaluated in comparison with merely average peers on traditional bases (e.g. finding a good match).
• A boy cannot develop into a man, while he is living in a society that prefers a man whose income is booming continuously on the expense of real manhood aspects (e.g. courage, ethics, values, leadership, etc.)

At last, but not at least, every product is a result of interacting and struggling elements. Therefore; if we think of life and surrounding societies and creatures as experiments constituting this life, our life would turn into one beautiful learning curve 🙂